A moment of pause.
May 14, 2016Posted by on
You forget how heavy a thing you get used to carrying around can get if you don’t stop to put it down from time to time. And while I’ve put this backpack down I’ve decided to toss out a few things from my past that I really have carried for far too long or for reasons that have long passed.
I’ve lived my life in 2 year checkpoints since I was 16 years old based on a single simple metric. Does X year old Adam think X+2 year old Adam is a better human being. Or simply put “Am I an older version of myself that a two year younger version of myself would respect?”
I’ve done a lot of self immolation, melting, and reforging in the last 6 years. So much so that sometimes I don’t recognize myself, but my metric has held true. As I’m getting more towards my statistical life midpoint I’ve begun to look the other direction in much longer terms. What is 90 year old Adam going to look back and have left behind to the world that all versions of me respect. Can I eventually leave behind something lasting of many or all impact? I don’t know, but while I’m temporarily pulled over I’ve been looking forward and backward in time and I’m feeling both lighter and hopeful.
While the comic is true, eventually you realize you can always melt a sword and make a better tool assuming you’re willing and able to get the metal hot enough. Which perhaps is the true burden; risk exposing yourself to make the world a better place.